Identity Part 4: Residence

     I know you are thinking, "what does residence have to do with identity?" I believe you will find yourself falling into one of these four categories: small town girl, small town girl living in a big city, city girl or a city girl living in a small town. You follow?!?
     When I got married, and until recently, I was a small town girl living in a big city. For years I often pleaded with my husband to consider moving outside of the city. Maybe not exactly the same small town he grew up in (which is also where we meet), but somewhere between city and small town. He insisted all the jobs would be in a big city, so it only made sense we lived close by.
     Almost 8 years of marriage and 4 kids later, we were making plans for the purchase of our first home. Obviously living in a 2 bedroom and 2 bath apartment just was not going to cut it much longer. Next logical step was to rent or to buy a home. And reasonably one of the first questions we started asking ourselves was what location.  Before I even said a word he said, "I'm ready to get back to my southern comfort zone." Needless-to-say he still works in the big city, but with a 45 minute commute he is back to small town living! 
     Now mind you, we don't have any cattle or farm, but we have plenty of space for kids to run around. We love the bright stars at night. Being able to have our own fire going, and hearing the howling of the coyotes in the distance is just one of the luxuries. Boys have their own digging hole in backyard. Lightening bugs in spring. We often spend nice days outside as much as possible doing things around the house, or like recently clearing out our creek. When I wake up and look out my kitchen window I see cardinals and blue jays playing in the yard. For us it is like a little piece of heaven. Eventually I would love to have a few chickens and a small garden (don't worry I'll be sure to capture those adventures in a post!).
     As expected in a small town it has its down sides, like how fast news travels. We are still new and it takes awhile to get to know people. For parts around here there are about three important things; family, church and sports. Home is where the heart is.

Joshua 24:15b (NIV) "But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord."

Name: Jamie
Occupation: Mom
Marital Status: Married
Gender: Female
Residence: Small Town

                                                                        Our first fire!

                                                          Sam playing in the little creek.

                                            Josh got to be the first on our new tire swing!
                                        

Southwest Chicken Salad

Ingredients:

2 boneless skinless chicken breast
Lemon Pepper seasoning
1 package of Italian dressing mix
2 tsp of lemon juice
2 tbsp of water
2 tbsp of white vinegar
1 (15 oz) can of black beans
1 (15 oz) can of corn
1 cucumber
1 tomato
2 kiwi
1 bag of premade salad (I like the ones with multiple types of lettuce, carrots, and cabbage)

Toppings:

Shredded cheese (about 1 cup)
Croutons
Salad Dressing (My husband and I like Catalina and our kids like Ranch)

Directions:

First I cut the chicken into 1 in cubes. Cook them
in pan over stove top and add lemon pepper.
About a teaspoon. Cook until white.
 

Once it is cooked, you can set it aside in a medium bowl.



Next I cut up the kiwi, tomato, and cucumber.
I like them bite size. But however you prefer is
fine. Then add them to the bowl with the
cooked chicken.

Then I pour out the can of black beans and corn
into a strainer, rinse them off. And them to the
bowl with cooked chicken.


Now add the 2 tbsp of water, 2 tbsp of white vinegar, 2 tsp of lemon juice and the package of Italian dressing mix into the medium bowl. Stir well.


Put the bag of premade salad into a large bowl.
Add all the medium bowl on top and mix.  

Salad is ready, now add your favorite toppings. We added some cheese, croutons, and Catalina dressing.


This is my hubs favorite salad! Enjoy, and add some of your favorites to make it your own!

Identity Part 3: Gender (Female, duh!)

     Female ... Duh! Although in this house that is nothing to snicker at! By all means, I do not claim to be a girly-girl. On the other hand, my life is full of sports (practices, games, watching sports on TV etc.), dirt, fighting, superheros, a sea of blue and any and all boy stuff. So much so I have to remind myself I do enjoy painting my nails, attempting to 'dress up' occasionally, wear make-up (which usually consist of eyeliner, mascara, and lip gloss) and every once in awhile a hang out with another female! I think for all females this is important, go out with a sister, mom, friend, church group etc. every once in awhile.
     This just happens to be one of those rare occasions. My friend and I our celebrating our birthdays with a GNO (Girls Night Out)! So don't think this happens often. But to ensure it happens more often than not, we have made a pact to have a GNO once a month. Our birthdays are months apart, but due to weather and other schedule conflicts we are combining them into one night with a pedicure and a nice dinner (and of course going to stores to see what we can find that we might not get to do with kiddos).

     First picture is of our pedicures, matching colors of course!
 

     This is us, we are just browsing at a store to see what screams "buy us" as we wait until dinner time!

     As with the many labels in our lives right now I think this is the one most often we neglect. Not saying we need to drop everything so we can go out all the time. But it should be on occasion we can leave our kids and spend a little time with other women. To simply enjoy the fact that we are women, pamper yourself every so often because you deserve it! We do not even go get pedicures often (this was the second time in my life!), our favorite place to go to is Half Price Books! It can be inexpensive, watch a chick-flick or go window shopping somewhere the men in your life would not likely go with you.

Name: Jamie
Occupation: Mom
Marital Status: Married
Gender: Female (duh)

This section is called 'The Wife of Noble Character' Proverbs (all NIV) 31: 10-31. I'm going to highlight a few of my favorite verses that speak out to me.

v. 10-12 'A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.'

v. 15 'She gets up while it is still dark; she provides food for her family and portions for her servant girls.'

v.17 'She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her task.'

v. 26 'She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.'

v.28 'Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.'

v.30 'Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.'

Identity Part 2: Marital Status

     In this season of my life I feel like I have so many titles over my head, like; mom, wife, woman, homeschooler, cook, maid, chauffeur etc. ... I almost feel lost in the web of titles and their responsibilities. Anyone else out there feel caught in the same web?! I don't want to lose the love and the person I am, because I am trying to fulfill all these titles. I want to enjoy life's little moments and at the end of the day still have some sanity left!
     Today's topic is about the title of being someone's spouse, a wife in my case. Might I add, thank the Lord I am not raising these 4 boys on my own (single moms ROCK!)! Thank you Lord for bringing me a companion. I could go on and on, but lets stop and reflect on this passage before we continue. It is one of my favorite.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (NIV)
'There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time to for war and a time for peace.'

     To give you some personal history, my husband (Travis) and I got married on our 3 year anniversary and have been married now for a little over 9 years. This passage doesn't just speak about marriage but it certainly can apply. Speaking of seasons, I think marriage in its own has a few.

Season 1: Puppy Love (as my granny would call it)
     Almost a love but more based on physical chemistry and impressions. You know when you would spontaneously buy them gifts, for no reason other than you loved them. Write love letters and stare endlessly into each others eyes.

Season 2: In Love
     Oh newly weds, aren't they refreshing to see. Still learning each others little quirks. Like how OCD your wife is about cleaning (especially bathrooms) or how your husband leaves his clothes where ever he changes (side of bed, bathroom floor, closet but puts them in wrong laundry basket...). Yet there is still that spark of fire. Holding hands, date nights or other romantic gestures.

Season 3: Real Love
     And there is the love that multiplies... well for us it did! This is the season we are in now. I still remember those date nights, but now they are few and far in-between. Our usual date night now consist of the kids being in bed, watching a movie, and making some late night snack. The love letters have turned into honey to-do list. And there are several little hands in-between ours. Yes, it's busy and crazy but we know this is only for a season.

     These seasons have no set time frame in which they occur. For some it could be but a few short months and others could be years. And yes there are seasons of pain or distance, but these too are just a season and shall pass. So what's the next season of marriage ... Managing Teen Boys, Empty Nest, or something with Adventure in the title??? Honestly I do not know, but I anxiously await.

Name: Jamie 
Occupation: Mom
Marital Status: Married


 

Identity Part 1: Occupation

  
     I am always baffled when the question of my occupation comes up. It usually results in unemployed or none. Does anybody else get the 'you don't have a job' vibe from people?!? Obviously I get the unemployed status for paper work situations. It is the family, friends, and strangers that seem to give off this vibe.
     My four boys go nearly everywhere I do, so I suspect most people don't think I do nothing all day. Some reason, they are young so it is good I am able to stay home with them. Yet for other people I think their opinions either fall into two margins; 'don't you get bored' or 'that's it'?
     No, I am not bored nor do I get bored. Lest just say all I did was tend to the kids; feed them, care for them and love them. How could anyone get bored? Even if I had just one child to devote all my attention to, at the end of the day I would still lay my head down feeling exhausted. Lets ponder on this one, I want you to get a visual. Because for those who think that clearly do not know or forgot somehow. Wake up to baby crying, well it's time to nurse him. Then, change his diaper and you might as well put a load of his clothes in the washer. Next, if your lucky start a pot of coffee without him needing your immediate attention. Okay maybe you calmed him down enough to quickly wash your face and change clothes. Now, lets get that little bundle of joy dressed. Wrestling with him as you put on his socks because he has learned how to roll over and starting to crawl. Alright you are both dressed, now lets try feeding him some of his baby cereal. That was a mess, now wipe his hands and face off, his tray, and the table. If you have little dogs you might escape from having to sweep up the mess on the floor. Change his diaper again (eww this one will probably the stinky loaded diaper kind). Put clothes into dryer. Get him in his car seat and run off to doctors for his check-up. You're home now so you make a quick sandwich, eating it with one hand while nursing baby. Phew, nap time has come! Oh but only for baby because now you need to fold his clothes, maybe take a quick shower or prepare for dinner. So you get my point, this is just a glimpse of a half day with one young child. Bored ... Ha I laugh, with sarcasm.
     And to the later mind set of 'that's it,' NO! Personally I am homeschooling them and trying to start a small business with friend. Neither of which is easy be all means. Imaging doing all your errands, wifely and motherly duties, and trying to give your kids an education. No it's not just a phase, it is a way of life we have chosen for our family. Not to mention, any SAHM (Stay At Home Mom) I know has something on the back burner while managing things at home. Either it be serving in the church or some other community group, writing, self employment, part time job etc.
     The list of my day to day or week to week routine is daunting. Maybe I'll share it, but that is for another post! Right now I'll just randomly list some of my task outside of 'just staying at home': a lot of home-cooked meals, cleaning house and four munchkins, budget and pay bills, shopping for groceries and anything else for the household, doctor appointments, sport practices and games, church activities as well as serve in some, bible study, go to fitness classes, some yard work, lesson plans, grade papers etc. ...
     I know many great moms with jobs that fulfill their career desire, or at least pursuing it. They too manage errands, caring for kids, and all the other tedious chores around the house. Remember this is about me, selfish I know (lol). Really it is for all stay at home moms. Homeschooling or not, temporarily or permanent. When the word 'career' or 'occupation' come up don't let it fester inside you like a thorn. Because you know, your career right now is raising your child(ren). I think it is called PARENTING. The most important job you will have. So savor your time with them, build everlasting relationships, and direct them to the one who knows all, God, so they might inherit your morals and beliefs. To some it will always be peculiar why we decided to leave behind any career we might have had to just stay at home. But to us we will know it is the career we where called for.

Name: Jamie
Occupation: Mom

Today I leave you with this verse from Psalm 51:10 (NIV) 'Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.'

When I think of the fleeting task ahead of me while I 'just staying at home' and tend to my children I ask God to renew my spirit for whatever is to come.  

Taco Soup ... or Stew

Taco Soup

 

 

     Well it's getting cold out again ... here is one of our all time favorite crock-pot meals!

Ingredients:

24 oz can of beans, whatever is your favorite (I like Bush's)
24 oz can of tomato sauce
14.5 oz can of diced tomatoes (can put rotel if you want it spicy)
14.5 oz can of whole kernel corn
1/2 pk of taco seasoning
1/2 pk of ranch dressing seasoning
1 lb ground beef
4-6 corn tortillas

Directions:

In medium fry pan cook ground beef, drain, and add to crock-pot. Add all other ingredients to crock-pot, even juice from can of corn. Stir well and cook low for 6 hrs or high for 3 hours. Ten minutes before you are ready to serve, shred the tortillas and add them to crock-pot. 

DONE! So nice to have a warm meal with little work.

Some of our favorite toppings are cheese, crackers, and sour cream.

How Our Homeschool Journey Began

     December is a even more chaotic time for our family than normal, so sorry it has been so long since last post. We are just now getting back into a good routine. Routine, you may ask what that might look like with four little monkeys, but I will disclose that detail in another post.

     My husband and I were both in public schools growing up, so this thought of homeschooling did not just appeal to us at first. Sure there were some negative aspects about public school system, but we really thought, "Oh well, what can you do," or "that's just the way it is." I won't go into discussing all those little details, because honestly its not important and every system has their flaw. But I will share the main points in our decision making process.
     About the summer before my oldest son was suppose to be starting pre-k homeschooling was brought up in a marriage conference DVD study we were going through. We made a list of what we thought were the pro's and con's. The bottom line was how could we financially live on one income?!? So we went on a search for a nearby preschool. I knew in Texas headstart was a financially based program. Meaning you had to make under a certain amount to qualify or have some other special requirements to even apply, unless you planned on sending them to a private school which would be a good chunk of change. For some reason I just assumed the public schools that offered pre-k was free, WRONG! I was told by several schools unless your family makes 30,000 or less, a parent in the military, or had another language besides English as their primary language we did not qualify. Now this might be different where you live, but I did my research and this was the case where we lived. Then our thought was to see how expensive would it be for private pre-k, and surprisingly not too bad. But in combination of the day care cost would just not be attainable for us at that time. Plus our day care notified us that any private pre-k in town would be too far for them to pick up our child, and so we would have to make other arrangements for dropping them off after pre-k to the day care. Which again was a problem. There are some day cares that have pre-k, but our day care was in the process of being certified. And that would mean trying to find another day care that was certified to teach pre-k, affordable for us (we also had a child under one at that time), and had room for both children in age appropriate classes. Needless to say we were shocked, overwhelmed, and just down right frustrated!
     We made the decision to just keep him in the current day care, which he loved and was teaching basic skills for pre-k anyways, and to do as much pre-k work at home as we could. It was difficult to say the least. Both of us were working full time jobs, we had two children (4 and almost 1), maintaining the typically parent duties (house chores, meals, normal care for kids, and just spending time with them), they were at day care all day, and then trying to find time and energy to teach him things so he would be ready for kindergarten. Now I've always wanted a third child, and our youngest was reaching 18 mon. and I was having baby fever! I had a job that offered pretty good health insurance, and the thought came to me: what if I have our third child while I have health insurance then when he is born I can just stay home and homeschool Josh for kindergarten. Logically thinking of the expenses of gas commuting to work and extra cost for a third child in day care was not worth me still working. And naturally thought well if I'm staying home I might as well give homeschooling a shot. I wasn't sure if homeschooling was right for us, or if I was even qualified to teach him, but I reasoned that if I was genuinely going to give it a shot kindergarten was the best year to start.
     Some of our major con's for homeschooling were: incorporating our religion into curriculum, we could select the social out-lets our kids would be involved in (such as community sports and church events), and I was going to be able to build a lasting bond with my kids (to truly know them and to base school off their needs and desires not just a general study or something that might pertain to some kids and not all)! I've always dreamed of staying home with my kids until they started school. I did end up working until the end of my third pregnancy, but God was about to bless me more than I ever imagined. I was starting to dread my work days., being gone from my kids all day. When I got home it was dinner, bath, bed and if we were lucky we got in a little play time between bath and bed. I thought, was this really what parenthood was all about? On the other spectrum, just as long as I have been dreaming about being a mom I also had a dream of being a nurse. I loved helping people. But it came to me as my children will only be this age once, and then its gone. What will I do when I have no children under foot. So I reasoned that would be my time to pursue a career and now was the time to devote my energy and time into my children.  
     Cost now with adding a third child was not an issue, public school systems were starting to seem like the wrong answer, and socialization never seemed to be a problem. The desire to grow close relationships with my kids and to give them a strong foundation in faith seemed far more superior in priority. Now that third child is 2 1/2 years old, and I can say it has not been all sunshine and roses. Sometimes a rain of tears and storms with frustration seem more fitting. Homeschooling to us really has been a life style change. A-learning-curve, and in fact I'm still learning. Trying to find that groove on the bumpy path of life, but I have NO REGRETS! With a supportive husband and four smiling faces looking at me everyday I gear up for the daily challenges.

A promise from God I hold dear to my heart.
Proverbs 22:6 NIV
'Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.'